Ok ppl, *kneeling down* I admit i totally forget about having a blog here! HAHA! so long time never update! But that's really thanks to my previous laptop. Since the laptop broke down, I have to share computer with my sis. but of cuz i couldn't do blogging there cuz mostly i m complaining about her! HAHA! And the biggest secret is here. So i couldn't update that time, and after i got my new laptop, i seldom have time to blog cuz obviously my PREVIOUS boss was exploiting me. And till now, when i finally able to retrieve everyone's blog address, then only i realise how long i didn't update! =.=
Ok, so, I guess most of you know what i was doing so far, cuz you know my blog only patheticly around 5 ppl reading it and these 5 ppl, we often update each other la! HAHA!
Oh well, yeah, after i quit from my previous company, it's been almost three months resting at home. I enjoy the slow path lifestyle in my hometown kluang, I love to have a car to go wherever i want, I enjoy cleaning my house and stay in it, I love the relaxing lifestyle here. That's y i seldom be back to singapore, cuz I m thinking since i m going back for work for sure, so what for stay there for long, it's also very troublesome to my aunt. So i m back till now. Guess I have to search for job next month. So many ppl asking, i m getting more and more stress up now. But good news my body is slowly recovering now. Even gong gong told me not to be rush to find a work, better have a healthy body then only can work for long. HAHA! I din know i was THAT serious! HAHA!
Although i like my lifestyle here, but of cuz i feel sad staying at home too. As you guys know, long time problem, family problem. The longer i stay at home, i m getting so stress up at home too. I dunno when my father is going to scold my mum, i dunno what my mum done might provoke that old man. I have so many things to worry and that's why i keep my house clean all the time as i dun wan that my father use any of that as an excuse to scold my mum. although long time ago i have already gave up on my family, but still, whenever see my mum, serving dinner for my dad, i feel even more sad for my mum. That's also one of the reason why i need to stay here for so long. I hope i can use all my free time now to accompany my mum, relieve her from the housechores, make her happy all the time, and to block as many bullets' as possible from my dad. It's really depressing, but i couldn't talk about it to my brother and sister. This is the problem that we wished to keep it deep in our heart, buried it, best if no one would ever want to dig it up and discuss. I am really envy how close my fren's family bonding, but i know i can do nothing about it. The only thing i can do is just protecting my mum, I m just hoping she can live everyday happily. As for my dad, still i will do my part as a daughter, but he already lost my faith on him long time ago. I m not going to hurt myself more to know more about him and that irritating mistress. Want to have a new family outside, go ahead, just stop stabing on our heart.
Three months staying at home, there's happy memories as well as sad memories. But i guess sad memories just overpower the happy one. Recently my beloved nanny - aunty mama, passed away. When i was young, my parents were busy for work so normally i spent my daytime there. Compared to my brother and sister, i spent the lesser time there, i have no other play mates there, but still the time I spent there with her was the happiest memories in my life. She was so kind-hearted, patient and gentle nanny. She had never scold me before for doing anything wrong, everytime, she would be very patient with me, slowly explaining why i was wrong with me. I still remember whenever i was sick, i would recover fast when i stay there. I guess i really like to be with her. Fortunately, before she passed away, before my brother went oversea, we went to visit her, twice. Her daughter said she was really happy that before she passed away, she still able to meet all the little kids she took care before. I can do nothing for her, the only thing we can do was sending her off till the very last moment. Tears were filling on my eyes when I saw her lying on the coffin. Before that I told myself i couldn't cry, cuz i want her to go without worries. But still, we failed to do that, we cried by the side of her coffin. although physically she has gone, but still, she will live in my heart forever. I m gonna let my children know there's such a beautiful nanny tat took care of me. I will always remember her.
